Self-reliance.

"Envy is ignorance, imitation is suicide."

I knew I loved Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Every year I surprise myself when I rediscover my love of the Transcendentalists.  I mostly love teaching the ideas of nonconformity, self-reliance and confidence to my high school students, because who could possibly be a better audience for such ideas?

Nonconformity.  Self-reliance.  Confidence.

High school students generally stare at me, shaking their heads, confirming their understanding of the lesson I preach.  My hope, however, is not just that they understand Emerson's argument, but that at least one student reconsiders his or her desires to be anyone other than him or herself.

We are our best when we are ourselves.

After considering how much I hope these words, these lessons, will affect my students, I am always left wondering how well I have taken Emerson's words to heart.

While I am at a point in my life where I can confidently say I have transcended any desire of "imitation", jealousy is another story.  I am not above admitting that there are moments envy finds its way into my life.  I might be ashamed that this immature and selfish emotion still lingers in my life, but I'm not too proud to admit it.

What bothers me most about envy is that it blinds us in our ability to be thankful for what we DO have. I choose, therefore, to rise above such trivial feelings and find fulfillment in what I have, because I have so much.  What do shoes and clothes and smart phones have on love and friendship and family?  Absolutely nothing.

Thank you, Emerson.  Every year you remind me how trivial it is to want anything other than what I have.

I have everything I could possibly need.

The inevitable.

It has happened.  Cold season has found me and taken me under its vicious and relentless wings.

This means several things:

1.  8:00 bedtime.  DO NOT DISTURB.

2.  Christmas music will be on repeat.  Why?  It makes me happy.  Deal with it.

3.  Lots of soup and tea.

4.  I'm grouchy - you were warned.

5.  I'm worse at filtering my attitude (if it wasn't already obvious).

Best to stay away.  Blog updates will come when this monster has passed.

Gracious love.

November always brings thanks.  For the fortunate, myself included, the thanks are not in short supply. Today, however, my focus falls to the man in my life, rather than my other blessings.  It was four months ago today that I married him, and nearly five and a half years since we first started dating.

I took the time today, in this month of giving thanks, to consider what I have most enjoyed about dating, loving, and marrying Kyle.  The list is a long one, but I chose some of my favorites to share.  I love you Kyle.

1.  Our holiday road trip to Colorado.

A few years ago Kyle and I drove the 20+ hours to Colorado.  This trip was so special to me because I finally got to show Kyle my home, the place where I had grown up.  It had become as much a part of me, as I was it. He got to meet many of my extended family members, including my Aunt Kris and Uncle Paul who opened up their home for us, the entire week, feeding us gourmet meals and working around our packed daily schedules.  A week full of the Colorado landscape, included: skiing in Vail, wading in the natural hot springs of Glenwood, visiting the University of Colorado, roaming the desolate hallways of my Alma Mater, lunch at Casa Bonita (mostly because Kyle did not believe me when I told him it was a real place), listening to our echoes bounce off the beautiful Red Rocks, and of course, lots of time spent together in the car.  I fell deeper in love with him after I saw him fit so seamlessly into everything that was so familiar to me.

2.  Summers on the water.

Kyle's parents travel the coast of Indiana and Michigan in the summer months.  Kyle grew up on the water, enjoying the beaches and water sports that owning a boat offered.  I have been graciously added to these traditions, and I have thoroughly enjoyed seeing Kyle in his element, doing the things he loves.  From taking bike rides along the beach to picking berries and eating them right off the vines, Kyle and I have found so much joy in reaping the benefits of the life of boat owners - thanks mom and dad!

3.  Being both spectators and coaches.

Both Kyle and I have a passion for sports.  I grew up playing so many sports that my mom eventually had to tell me I was going to have to choose between them.  Kyle's experience was also one of an athlete.  Given our backgrounds and passions, athletics have followed us into this new phase of our life.  We still love attending sporting events together, cheering on our teams and becoming engulfed in the passion of fellow sports fans.  I have also enjoyed supporting Kyle from the sidelines, hoping all of his hard work as a coach pays off with victories and appreciation.  It's fun being a coach's wife.

4.  Watching our Sunday night shows.

While our tastes when it comes to entertainment may vary, we've found that we enjoy many of the same television shows.  Sunday nights have become one of my favorite of the week because we both know that despite it being the end to the weekend, it is our time to enjoy one another and put aside all other worry, concern or stress.  Now, if we could just add a little puppy, we might just complete the perfection this night holds.

5.  The family love.

I have enjoyed seeing Kyle become more and more comfortable with my family, so much so that my sisters truly see him as a brother, and my parents view him no differently than they would if he was their own son.  My family has always been very important to me and I always knew that my future husband was going to have to get their approval.  It's rewarding and refreshing to see that Kyle has exceeded approval and has found acceptance and love.  I have also enjoyed becoming closer to Kyle's family.  From spending summer weekends on the boat to enjoying special evenings at Chicago Pizza & Oven Grinder, Gatto's or Taco Real.  Family will always be important to both of us and I cannot wait to see what joys the future holds with additions that might just be made :)

These are just a few of the many wonderful experiences I've shared and enjoyed with my new husband. It is fun to consider our relationship and its growth over the past six years.  To think that we've just skimmed the surface of the memories we'll share is exciting.  I'm so looking forward to finding new ways to grow closer and continue to enjoy one another's company.  

We are so blessed, and I am so thankful.